Charity's Crazy Beautiful Life

Proud Mary -- I mean, Proud Momma

I feel like this week has kept me rollin', rollin', rollin' on a river...or maybe it was goin', goin', goin' to the pool. Which has made me one proud momma! Here's why:

I signed my younger two up for summer swim team about a month back. They haven't swam in almost two years. So on the four mornings a week that they swim for two hours, they have been a bit hesitant. Not quite "in the game". And when last Tuesday rolled around, the day they had their first summer swim meet, they were a bit nervous. Which was completely unwarranted because...

they killed it! Colby came in first place in two events, and second in his third. 

(I thought this picture was pretty funny...Colby's head.) He even set a team record in one if his events. GO COLBY, YOU ROCK!!! (I have to laugh, because that is always what he asks me to write on his back...giggle, giggle.)

And my girl...

she was afraid that she would no longer have what it takes to swim with the kids her age that have been swimming for years. Well, I know I'm a little bit biased, but I think she still has it, and she can bring it too! She was the only girl in her age group that volunteered to swim the butterfly, so here she is, swimming with the boys! (She's on the right in the white swim cap.)

Needless to say, my awesome daughter also kicked bootay in the swim meet. She made first and second in two of her events. And then two days later, Allyssa, (who also still likes to get "sharpied up")...

found out that she did so well on her times that she got to move up two lanes.  I don't know much about swimming, but I've heard that that's kind of a big deal. It means that she's doing really well, (which doesn't surprise me). She'll be swimming with some of the older kids... kids who have been swimming a long time. And now, she's completely "into" swim team again. She's talking about it again with excited anticipation, which shows me that I was doing the right thing when I coaxed her into swimming this summer. And Colby has said a few times lately that "swim team is fun...and it's good 'cause it'll help me get in shape for football". Heh, heh, priorities. So, this is all affirmation for me...that I'm doing the right thing to wake my kids up early four days a week during their summer vacation, to go to the pool.

Summers spent swimming -- it's a good thing!

Have a splashingly fun Saturday!
~Proud Momma

Computer companions...

I sat down tonight at my computer to tell you about the flea market I went to today to sell some of our junk, about the horrible sunburn I got while there, about a Colby story that's going to make you laugh (I think)...but I just sat here in a tired, sunburned induced daze and looked around at my computer desk for a moment and had a good laugh. What IS all this stuff sitting by my computer??? Oh my. Since we went to dinner tonight and I treated my tired, sunburned self to a White Russian, I'm really in no state to tell you about any of that. Instead, tonight I'm going to go slather on some of that aloe gel, take a couple Motrin (hey, does ibuprofen and vodka mix? well, i guess I'll find out...) and enjoy a movie with the family. Tomorrow...I'll fill you in on that green lettuce knife tomorrow...I promise! And I'm curious, what's sitting next to YOUR computer?
  

Missing him...Killian

Tonight I was wrapping Killian's presents....and an overwhelming feeling came over me. I miss him!!!!!!!!! It's been nine...wait, ten months since we've seen him. 

Since right before we left Montgomery back in February. And I know I'm only his stepmom, but I've been a part of his life for eleven years and it's hard to be so far away. The hardest part tonight has been...putting together an album of family pictures for him. Pictures that he's not in.

 

 Pictures where there needs to be another big brother.

 

 

Pictures where there needs to be another son.

 

Pictures where there's supposed to be one more child. Because our family...it is blended, yes. So most of the time you will only see five of us. But really, there are supposed to be six.

And when I start to focus on that. On how much I miss having him in our lives more. On how I miss the daily interactions, him being a part of our holiday traditions and nightly prayers...it's times like these that I have to pause for a minute and reflect, and be thankful for the time we have had with him.

Thankful for the several folders on my computer filled with pictures of us all together last Christmas. Of the two weeks we got to spend together in Orlando at Disney World before we moved worlds away. Of captured memories like this one...

My tuckered and tired kiddos after a week and a half of Disney World...on Christmas eve in their new pajamas, with their new ornaments and the tiny tree we brought to our hotel room.
 

And on night's like this, after I count my blessings, I ask God for grace. Grace to be the best stepmom I can be. Grace to get through times when I miss Killian. Grace to do all that I can from afar -- sending love, family photos and lots of prayers.

 

I hope this makes you laugh...

I don't know about you...but in our family, we joke, and poke fun, and play around... ALOT!! We call each other nerd, geek, loser and dork -- and we know it's all in fun. And we're joking! No one walks away with hurt feelings. Sometimes I think we probably joke like this alot more than most families. That our family is probably filled with more pranks than most familes. I don't think it's bad. Actually, for us, it makes our family fun. We laugh. We think it's funny. But sometims I wonder, if others would think it's a little over the top.

Tonight, as I was doing the last of my Sunday evening routine with the kids, Craig started chuckling as he was on the computer checking emails. I asked why he was laughing. He read me this, an email from his daughter. (Yes, she is his daughter when she does things like this!) And, yes, I am talking about the same daughter that I just posted about in my last blog. Which is, yes, the same daughter that I sill picture in my minds eye, as my sweet-smelling, cuddly baby...who is usually considerate and kind. And I really can't believe that she even knows HOW to send an email. But what amuses me the most is that she would send one like this...

----------------------------------

From: allyssa

To: craig and daziel

Hi you guys. I noticed when I first met you that you guys are complete NERDS!!!!!!! I don't care what you say. Daddy- We need to have a tickle fight. Daz- You should practice hitting home runs on the Wii.
 Allyssa

P.S. I don't mean to be mean but you need some Listerene. Not a swallow but the whole dang bottle. (I am joking with all of this, so don't get all emotional.)

----------------------------------

Now, I laughed. And thought it was pretty stinkin' funny! And Craig obviously did too. And I think it's funny that she plays on her winning batting streak on the Wii and uses that angle with Daz, as she knows he'll probably be a little "sore" about it. Smart girl, I thought. Hey...I have brothers. I know how sibling rivalry goes. And it was all in the name of fun and laughs. That little P.S. thing that she said, by the way, came from a playground chant that she learned years ago...which we've already discussed is not that nice. But apparently, she has learned that being that nice with her dad and her brother does not apply? To which, again, I laughed.

 

Then I started to feel a little guilty. (And by the way, when I say "little", I mean little.) And then, I had to ponder my parenting skills for a little bit.  I started to wonder if my child was going to end up being one of those, you know, mean girls... which again started to worry me, a little.

 

To make myself feel better, I made her go do a chapter in her Sunday School book, say two Hail Marys, and apologize to her brother. (Her Dad? I think mybe he had it coming.) Ok, maybe I didn't make her do that. How could I, I laughed about it!?! But should I? Or maybe it is I who needs to be reading chapters out of Sunday School books and saying Hail Marys! Yes, indeed, I do!

 

Good night all!

 

mommy lessons

My husband, who apparently reads my blog much more than I realized, made a comment to me this morning while we were having our routine morning phone call. (Yes, that's an example of life as a military couple -- many times we are reduced to having to sustain our relationship through phone calls, emails and letters. Who am I kidding -- it's 2009, I don't mean letters, I mean Facebook.) So, during our morning conversation, Craig said to me, "Sounds like you had a bad day yesterday with Colby."  "No", I said, "why would you think that?"  "Well, because of what you posted yesterday on the blog."

Ha. Ha ha ha ha. Ha ha.

He he ha! I laughed for a while.

Then I proceeded to tell him that, no, I didn't have a bad day with Colby. That surely it hadn't been that long since he'd been around Colby. That surely he had to know that yesterday was a good day with Colby. Because, if I can send him into time-out and come in to check on him and still think he looks cute -- then that's a good day!

On the other hand, there are days that are not so good. With Colby. With the rest of my brood. Sometimes, we have those days where none of us are on the same page. And especially lately, considering our circumstances, we have had days when we're all cranky, or missing Craig...when I'm tired, they're wired...when this one doesn't want to listen , this one doesn't mind listening as long as it's to the beat of his own drum, and this one, she to gets so stinkin' rotten sassy. And sometimes, sometimes...I just don't have the patience for it.  Sometimes, I wish they could just...learn their lesson, behave, mind their manners, obey, and do what they're told without whining or getting an attitude. And then sometimes...

sometimes, I hate that I don't have the patience for it. Or that I'm too tired to deal with it.

So I've been working on my tolerance level and how I react when I feel like my patience is running thin.  Tonight, after dinner, I sent my kids outside to play. To run out some energy because we had been having a bit of a day. Nothing big. but a few minor melt downs that had this tired mamma at the end of her rope. A little bit of not listening mixed with a lot of attitude blended with a tired mom kind of just made it one of them days. While they were outside, I did some relaxing, reading and slow breathing. I had to be able to finish the day without completely loosing my patience.

While I was reading, I happened upon this scripture that really helped me end my not-so-great day:

Proverbs 22:6  Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it.

It helped me to dig deep and finish the evening with my kiddos with the patience I needed to give to them; the patience they deserve. I was able to calmly put them to bed and spend some time with each of them, talking to them, reading with them, saying prayers. And digging deep to know that they're having a rough time right now too. That yes, I might be tired, but that they miss thier dad and they're tired too.

Reading that scripture and taking my time before I dealt with them tonight also helped me to learn a lesson: that sometimes, it's about me, and not about them. How I handle them; not how they're not handling themselves. Because -- they are children. That's why I'm the mother. Because I have to guide them, I have to prepare them for their future. Even when I'm tired. Even when my patience is running thin. Even when I'm doing it "alone" because their dad is half a world away. Even when it's easier not to.

The reward? Tonight I get to go to bed feeling good about my day. Well, good that I ended my day on a good note. Feeling like I'm making progress -- like I'm learning my mommy lessons.

For the love of -- Daziel

Two weekends ago my oldest child, my first born, my very first baby boy turned twelve.

 

As a parent, watching your children grow -- and grow -- and grow is a bit bittersweet. I would even venture to say it can be hard. I remember holding my babies, and watching them toddle around, and their first this and their first that...their first day of school. So having to endure my son's 12th Birthday when I still remember his 1st very vividly...yep, you got it! Hard. 

  

What made it even harder was that we were in the middle of this move to Japan.  So, my poor boy was away from his friends that he's had for the last four years.  And yes, as we always try to remember, 'tis the way of military life.  And we try not to complain. But sometimes it is hard. So, especially because of that -- because of being in transition, I didn't want the day to just come and go without a bang! We are in the middle of moving and I wanted to make it special. I wanted Daziel to know that our traditions and our family is what we make it, no matter where we go. 

So I asked Daziel what he wanted to do on his special day. He of course wanted his Birthday Breakfast -- because that is a tradition in our family.  No matter what day we celebrate your birthday and have your party, no matter if it's a big party or just dinner with a friend, we always, always, start your actual birthday out with a special Birthday Breakfast. Whatever you want it to be, whether that is pancakes with m&m's and cool whip... or what Daziel requested this year... eggs benedict perfected by Uncle Darold. 

When I was planning what else we'd do for the rest of Daziel's birthday, I was a bit surprised by his reaction. I offered to take him to Silverwood, a theme park not too far from here. I told him we could take him to play laser tag, or to go fishing...but my boy, he just nodded and with a ho-hum little voice he said "yeah, whichever will be ok".  So I thought, and I talked to my boy, and I thought some more. What was making him so glum? He finally told me he was bummed about not getting to spend his birthday with my husband, Craig. You see...Craig was gone last summer too -- he was deployed for four months.  So my boy was bumming about that...and who can blame him? This whole moving and being away from the ones you love kind of stinks. But, Craig's already in Japan, we're here, there wasn't much I could do about that.

So, I thought and thought some more...about my boy and what he was feeling. And I thought of another option for his birthday, an option I was a bit hesitant to suggest.

You see, we are staying with my sister Angela -- who just so happens to live in the same town as Daziel's father.  So, I worked up the courage and I set my feelings aside -- I asked Daziel if he'd like us to have a family barbecue with his dad and all his dad's family. His eyes lit up, he smiled and said "yeah!".  So, I went about planning it out. Daziel and I even sat down one evening to plan it out with his father.  Because even though his father and I aren't best buds, and even though we've had some very major disagreements that were/are being worked out... I thought it was still very important for us to wave a white flag, to call a truce, and to throw a party -- together -- for our son. So Daziel could see us working together for him.  We hadn't done a party together for Daziel since his 3rd Birthday. I wasn't so sure that I was up to it.  But I was sure it was what my boy wanted -- so that's what he got!

 

He got to spend the day with all of us (who could make it on such short notice) together...with his father...

 

with his beautiful grandma, who I love so much!  (And even though it's been 12 1/2 years since I've dated her son, I have a feeling she loves me too. As she walked into the backyard, she was carrying two huge trays of her homemade enchiladas. And as she was giving me a great big hug, she told me that she made them especially because she remembers that they were my favorite -- gosh, I really do love her!!)

 

He got to spend the day with his uncle -- who -- wow! Doesn't he look so much like!?!!

 

Daziel got to have his wonderful aunts there. It's funny, because I really love his father's family. I was a part of their family for the 2-ish years that we dated. And it was nice to see them and to visit with them for an afternoon. It was nice to see how we could all come together for the same goal ...

 

to play and have fun...

 

to slip and slide...

 

to do a pinata "the right way"...

  

to scramble for the candy (as I was showing my mom these pictures, she remarked about how much I look like Daz's grandma in these pictures -- weird)...

 

to enjoy the yummy mexican candies inside of it..

 

which was followed by a special cake made by Uncle Darold and decorated by Aunt Angie, and cousin, Bethany.

 

That day was all about making sure that a very special "little" boy felt very, very loved!!

12 years -- I can't believe it!

My oldest, Daziel, turned 12 today.

 

Twelve years ago, I was seventeen. Having him changed my life forever... and I would not change it for anything. Twelve years later, I hope I'm making as much of a difference in his life as he has made in mine.
I love you Daziel, Happy Birthday!!!

Beware: this post talks about puke! (But only a little.)

Today, my friends, I could share with you about my day...about how I took the kids to Hannah Montana: The Movie, how we all liked it, and how it was much better than I thought it would be. Or, I could tell you about how I attempted to take the kids to Saturday Night Mass. How, after being there for five minutes, Daziel told me he was sick to his stomach and puked at the back door as we were hurriedly trying to find him a bathroom. My poor boy! Or, I guess I could tell you about how Colby decided to join Daziel and now both of my boys have been sick all night long.

But no -- no, no, no. I won't do that to you. I won't go into those gory details. Instead, because neither of those topics sounds exciting or enticing... (And because I was missing my husband and going through pictures from when we were in Wisconsin and happened upon some funny pictures that are much nicer than talking about puke!) Today I share with you this:

 

And yes, this is how we -- we who lived in the South for almost four years-- dressed in the freezing cold Wisconsin weather while we were there.

Did I mention that while we were there we stayed with Craig's sister, Tracey? His happiest sister?

 

Well, yeah, ok, she is his only sister...his only sibling for that matter.

But just look at that smile. Doesn't she look happy? She's always smiling! No joke, Tracey is one of the smiliest (is that a word?) people I know.  Especially for pictures. Which makes me smile, and laugh, because that is SOOO the opposite of her brother. Oh, I'm not talking about the happy part. Craig can be a pretty jovial kind of fella. He just doesn't ever smile for pictures. He could be in the greatest of moods, but when a picture is taken, his smile disappears. Which means that we have a ton of pictures where Craig looks -- mad and annoyed. Which again, makes me laugh!  

Do you see Tracey's daughter, our niece? That's Mariah, and her red hair is for real! I think she is one of the cutest red-heads I have ever seen! 

   

On one of those cold, February evenings while we were visiting in Wisconsin, we took the kids out to play in the snow. Which kind of excited Craig and I, who had both grown up playing in the snow. It excited the kids too, because we hadn't seen snow in years!

 

Then our nephew, Matt, got out his four-wheeler.  Which enticed Craig to get out a four-wheeler. And what do you do in the snow with a four-wheeler? Well, you pull a kid on a tube, of course!!

  

Which of course enticed me to take pictures of that kid on the tube. But these pictures, they just didn't do. So, I climbed on the back of that four-wheeler, held onto my beloved camera with one hand and tried to hold onto my beloved husband with the other.

 

Hold on, Colby!

 

Aaaah, Craig, slow down....

yes, I know he's smiling...but I'm falling...

No, he didn't slow down or stop whipping around just because I was sitting backwards on the back of that four-wheeler. He didn't slow down for Colby either.

 

So we lost him.

Which means that Colby wasn't smiling any more.

  

So Craig did what any good father would do. He consoled his son.

Then asked, "Who's next?"

Gosh I miss him!

Gosh I miss that butt!!

(Ok, ok, sorry! He's been gone for a month.)

Mostly, I'm glad that I didn't have to talk any more puke tonight!

Hotel Homeschooling

So, since we've been on the road indefinitely, I've been homeschooling the kids.

When we pulled them out of school on February 13th, we knew they'd miss about a month. They're kind of lucky because they went to a military school and are headed to another military school... and you see, these military school's were ok with that. Not that they encourage absences.  They do, however, realize that we military kind live far from our families.  Which means that when we have the chance to go visit, even if it's in the middle of a move, we go visit!  

So plan A, when we were originally planning this military move, was to let the kids have a month off of school.  We would travel across the country visiting family, fly across the Pacific, land in Japan, and immediately enroll them in their new military school.  All would be well. But you probably know as well as I do that life hardly ever allows us to use Plan A. 

So about the time we were leaving Montgomery on the 13th of February, because we still didn't have Daziel's passport, I started thinking of Plan B.

Some of you may not know that the first year we lived in Montgomery I homeschooled the kids. Because of that, and our love of books,we have a nice little library of school books and games. Thankfully, in my Plan B thinking mode, I loaded up one whole suitcase of those types of things, some more relevant curriculum books, and their devotionals thinking that if I needed to, if things didn't work out as planned, I could homeschool the kids until we could make it to Japan. Ha!

The first week or two we were on the road I was pretty lax about it. I mean, we were on "vacation" and technically, I could always call it their "spring break", right? But as I saw the days on the calendar pass on with still no sign of a passport, I decided that I'd better hunker down and try to edjumicate my childrens a bit.  I mean, if I didn't, they could ultimately be doomed. They could be missing an important piece of the puzzle that could wind up creating a ripple effect. And for all I know, they could end up getting held back, or forget how to read, or get to the 10th grade and realize they didn't know anything about anything...all on account of missing a month or two of school "that year we moved to Japan". Oh, I know, I know. You're telling me I'm being a little bit melodramatic with all of this. What I really didn't want is for their brains to get dusty. I didn't want them to get out of the routine and discipline of school, and really, what else was I going to do with them ALL DAY EVERY DAY if I didn't?

We homeschool wherever we are staying during the week, and this week, it just so happens that we're staying in a hotel. So this morning after learning all about the Iditarod, we moseyed our way down to the hotel laundry room.

  

No, I didn't have unrealistic hopes of teaching the kids the mechanical workings of these washers. I just had a week's worth of laundry to do. So I filled up every single one of these washers and then...

 

we read...

  

in the laundry room of a hotel. Because that...that is our life right now.

Do You Know the Preamble??

Did you ever have to learn the Preamble in school? I don't know if I did -- but if I did -- I forgot it. Or...it was remembered in that part of my brain that only functions at 2am and wakes me from a dead sleep with a cobwebby grogginess...

(yes, I've got sleeping problems, people)...

So, Craig got home and was happy to be home and to see all of us. We were overjoyed to see him and the kids mauled him and tackled him and tickled him for about a day straight.   And then, they went back to school and we...SLEPT!  He was jetlagged and had sinus issues the first couple of days he was home. I got my sinus infection back and was running a fever then too. So, we basically slept for two and a half days. How romantic, hmnn?  But I'm still enjoying his all-day compay (he hasn't had to go back to work yet)...and we feel much better and very rested! 

Now we're all back to feeling somewhat normal and have been helping Daziel with his homework. I tell ya, 6th grade is really a family affair! Daz has WORLD HISTORY this year. He can earn extra credit tomorrow if he can recite the Preamble. So, for HOURS tonight (my son has a really hard time memorizing things) we listened to this and sang this song so he can recite it tomorrow. He NEEDS these extra credit points! 

And let me tell you -- the Preamble is NO LONGER in the cobwebby 2am parts of my brain.  Since I sang this School House Rock song about 50 million times tonight (no, I NEVER exaggerate) -- it's now in the "I'm stuck in your head and will still be stuck in your head when you wake at 2am, 6am, and will still be stuck next week" part of my brain.  With that said, we LOVED School House Rock the year I homeschooled, and we love it still.  If you haven't heard it, click on the links. It's worth a listen. And you never know...you might just learn the Preamble...

PREAMBLE

We the people of the United States,

in order to form a more perfect union,

establish justice, insure domestic tranquility,

provide for the common defense,

promote the general welfare and,

secure the blessings of liberty

to ourselves and our posterity,

do ordain and establish

this Constitution

for the

United States of America.

Don't Blink

My baby girl is officially nine today.

This year, because Craig is gone, we decided to do low-key Birthdays. The kids each got to choose their "Birthday Breakfast", they got a few gifts, and they got to invite one friend to dinner and dessert (whatever they chose for dessert) and to sleep over.  And to prove how unique and different all of my children are --Daziel chose s'mores around the campfire, Allyssa chose ice cream at Cold Stone Creamery and Colby chose to wait and have his cake with Daddy when he returns.

 

So, Allyssa was the last of these summer birthdays. And...she was actually invited to a sleepover last night. I almost said no. Why? Well, ummm...because I'm like that, I suppose. I have a hard time giving my kids up. And, it was her birthday. And I felt that she needed to be with family. With me. But then, I thought again...and...aren't you supposed to get what you want on your birthday?

So, I let her go. It was a slumber party with four of her friends, and then one was coming back here with her to celebrate her day. I was going to pick them up early...early enough to do her Birthday Breakfast.

But when I called...she laughed and giggled and told me "Mom, I'm having alot of fun...can we be picked up later?" (gulp) "Sure, sweetie..." I said "it's your Birthday, you get to do what you want."

 

This is the first time she hasn't had her Birthday Breakfast. It didn't bother her, though, she's been happy all day. She had a great night last night. A great day with friends. A fun dinner at her favorite restaurant with one of her best friends. She got the camera she wanted and took pictures all afternoon. .

       

And now, she's in bed asleep, and I'm sitting here wondering how the time has passed so quickly. How did she grow up so fast? It seems like just yesterday Craig and I were bringing her home from the hospital.

     

Another mom has been coming up to the school and volunteering lately and bringing her baby girl who is four months old. This baby is so adorable and sweet. She reminds me so much of Allyssa. I miss that. Her as a baby. Her as my baby.

 

I couldn't imagine this nine years ago. How bittersweet it is to see her grow. And she has...she's grown into such a wonderful young girl. A young girl that I am so very proud of. But when did it happen so fast? She's gone from loving Dora to wanting a cell phone. (Which, is NOT going to happen, by the way!) But...ummm...didn't someone have to consult me about this growing up fast business?

I mean, all I did was blink!

And can someone tell me, since when does NINE mean "grown"? I mean, she's still innocent. She still likes to play babies. But, she also likes to go into her room and giggle and whisper and put on makeup. She's as cute as can be and before I know it, I'll blink again, and she'll be sixteen. It has put a lump in my throat all day. For now, I think my solution is, as Kenny Chesney advises...DON'T BLINK.

*Funny, I'm realizing, I had the same kind of experience when Daziel turned nine. Hmnn...I wonder what it is about me and the number nine!?!

My Cheeks Hurt!!

Oh, come on, get your mind out of the gutter...I'm not talking about those cheeks!  I spent two and a half hours laughing my hiney off tonight.  You see, my friend Jamie and I went to see Bill Engvall tonight. You know...Bill Engvall...from the BLUE COLLAR COMEDY TOUR....the "Here's Your Sign" guy!?!! This was such a nice stress reliever. And oh me oh my...did it work! I don't think I've laughed so hard and so much for so long in...oh, I don't know how long. And what's funny was, you would think this was the kind of show our husbands would have wanted to go see. And, actually, I'm sure it was. But Jamie and I decided to go as a "girls night out" and it was cool because Jamie and I, we share something in common. A redneck sense of humor (among a few other things).  So we laughed and laughed until our cheeks hurt! Oh what a way to end the week!!

Can You Believe...

The new school year has begun already?  Can you believe that these kiddos are so stinkin' cute?  (*Please don't let them know that I called them cute. They'd totally gag, roll their eyes, and then moan, "Mommmmm!")

 

Can you believe they have such cute haircuts?  Can you believe they have such cute teachers?!?!

Can you believe I drove them to school and made asked them nicely to take a picture with their teacher in the doorway to their classroom? (To which they each replied "Sure, we'd love to!" *smile*) Can you believe that these kids look so grown up!?!? That they ARE so grown?  That I officially have a 6th, 4th and 1st grader?  I remember when I used to do home daycare and I'd take care of "School Agers"...and they seemed so big to me. So old.  That was back when I had a Kindergartner, a Preschooler and an Infant. Now, I'm the one with the School Agers that are so big. So old. Back then, when Daz started Kindergarten, I couldn't believe he was old enough.  That I already had a kid in school. And now, Colby, my youngest, is past Kindergarten.  It's kind of hard for me to wrap my brain around.  That my kids are getting so big. That summer flew by so fast and another school year is here already.  That my kids are growing up so fast. That...Wow. Sniff. Sniff. Pout. Tear. Breath. Sheesh! Can you believe I'm getting so sentimental over the first day of school? 

Ideal Summer Swim Team Mornings...

 

If you don't know this about me already, let me say, I am NOT a morning person! Ask my mother, ask my husband, ask my children.  I am just a programmed Night Owl. I get alot accomplished at night and I enjoy sleeping in.  This all has to do with my sleeping cycle and my sleep disorder, which is another story for another time.  So, I guess you'd say that summer would have been the perfect time to have had many late nights and lots of sleeping in kind of mornings.  And since I had just graduated and wasn't going to have homework, and we didn't have any hectic routines we had to be on...my summer dream was to do alot of relaxing, reading, and enjoying my summer flowers.  But, then...plans changed...

You see, I usually sign my kids up for swim lessons during the summer. But last summer I noticed something -- they were kind of -- um -- over it. I mean, they loved the swimming part.  They loved the pool. And the water.  And they loved learning new stuff. But, they had pretty much mastered what they needed to at swim lessons.  So, this summer, I decided to sign them up for Swim Team.  The kicker...they would swim Monday through Friday from 6:30 - 8:00am. And this started THE DAY after they got out of school.  No break.  And...they would have to do it on the base, which is fifteen minutes from the base annex, where we live.  Which meant, in order for my kids to swim, I was going to have to get up at 5:30 every morning to get them to swim team on time.  And on top of that, my husband deployed for the summer.  My friends who know that I'm not a morning person told me, "Charity, you're nuts!  Craig's gone, it's ok to give yourself a break for the summer"...or, "Are you nuts!? You are going to get up that early all summer long? You hate mornings!" 

But here's the deal.  I don't really hate mornings! I got up early, super early, for five years when I did home daycare and had to have my home open for business at 6:30am.  I used to prefer the 6am-2pm shift when I did shift work.  I am not a grumpy person in the morning.  I don't have to drink three cups of coffee, smoke two cigarettes or run five miles (obviously :-) to wake up.  Nope, not me. I just have to want to crawl out of my cozy, warm bed.  (Among a few other sleep disorder things, which I will get to another day, I promise, because I know you all really want to know more about how I sleep!) And this summer, swim team did that for me. It made me want to get out of bed; I looked forward to swim team mornings.  And not just because I got an hour and a half to do what I wanted, without having to watch kids, answer to kids, or deal with kids. Although, that helped. Not just because I had an hour and a half to read a book, take a walk, or sit and talk with another pool mom, although, that too was a plus.  But because, these swim team mornings were so calm.  Even though there were usually about fifty kids in the pool, all you could usually hear was the quiet and constant splash, splash, splash of the water as the kids were swimming lap after lap after lap.  And there is something about waking up to the bright sun beating on the blue water and watching your kids, so gracefully, glide through the pool, stroke after stroke after stroke. It was a nice way to start the day.  Until of course...

Colby runs walks really fast by and jumps in, trying to splash me and get me wet! 

And then laughs about it...

And then looks at me and gives me that Colby grin!  But that only lasts for a few seconds, and then even the youngest member of the Maxwell Sea Hawks Swim Team is back off to swim. 

And you know, it's been a week now since Swim Team has been over.  A week since I had to get up at 5:30am.  A week I've spent staying up late and sleeping in and "enjoying the last few days of summer".  A week of not having to worry about ravenous kids who acted as if they'd eat everything in my entire kitchen (because swimming REALLY DOES do that to kids).  A week of remembering how much I loved my swim team mornings.  A week of being thankful that I had that routine to ground us while Craig is gone.  A week of being grateful that the kids had a nice way to tire them out, give them something to look forward to, and a positive way to start their day.  And...I miss it.  I was happy to be up at 5:30 am.   I'd do it again in a heartbeat...for those ideal  Summer Swim Team Mornings.

No rest for the weary

I woke this morning to this.  Luckily, Daziel and I both woke up feeling much better today.  So we got up and headed to swim practice (we leave the house at 6am).  On the drive there, we saw so many trees down, basketball hoops and garbage cans blown over-- lots more destruction than what my little patio got.  Thankfully for me, but somebody's gonna have to clean that all up too.  Although, I guess, I get my fair share.  Daz and I are on our first day of feeling well, but Allyssa crawled out of the pool this morning limping.  She hurt her knee.  She was actually complaining a little this weekend that it hurt, so we've got an appointment today to get it looked at.  I want to make sure that, if it's injured, she doesn't do more damage.

It's kind of funny.  Me and a few other military wives were just joking about that's how it works when your husband is deployed.  Your car breaks down right before you're planning a road trip.  Or, all of your kids get sick at once.  You brave a storm and then wake up to see that life is still rolling along, just as if it hadn't happened, and no one says to you, "Slow down, take it easy, I know you were up all night with scared kids and don't have help.  Go get some sleep."  And luckily for me, this deployment, we don't have much of an agenda.  Accept swimming every morning at 6am.  But other than that, we're coming and going and sleeping (well, napping) and reading to our hearts content.  So I'm not complaining.  Just saying, this is how it all works.  But I guess the same can be said for a single mom, or a mom dealing with an ailment, or a terminally ill child.  So I'll gladly play my deck and not ask for another hand, please God.

Ok, gotta go get that patio cleaned off.  Have a great day!

  

"Who's that?"

  **Before I get started, please keep posting your favorite reads, shows and books on yesterday's post.  I love all the inspiration I've gotten so far, and in a few days I'll compile a list to share with you all so you too can make this the best "Ya-Ya Summer" you can imagine!**

"Who's that?"  In case you can't tell either... it's me.  This, friends, is my senior picture -- I was 17, three months pregnant (hence the overalls), and no, this wasn't a glamour shot!  I am really outside standing against a brick wall.  That's not a facade.  And I did my own hair...AND...my own makeup.  I even kindly told the makeup chick  that wanted to put MORE makeup on me, "No Thank You" with a polite smile on my face.  Although, I did let her put this concealer stuff on a huge pimple I had on my neck.  Then, I chalked that pimple up to pregnancy hormones.  Ha!  That now makes me laugh!  It could have just been teen hormones.  I was so young then, and I didn't even know it. I thought I was grown and mature enough to have a baby.  Good thing I had enough confidence in myself then, because the thought of being a young senior, and a pregnant senior at that, now gives me chills!  Wow! 

So, I'm showing you this picture now because -- my lovely, and thoughtful Mom brought it to me a few weeks ago and gave it to me as a graduation gift.  I thought that was sweet and very fitting.  My high school graduation picture that I've coveted and wanted to take home with me for years as my college graduation gift.

You see... for years now, every time I have visited my Mom, I have reminded her that when she decides to take that picture off of her wall, I'd like to have it.  And even the last time I was there, and I had seen that she had taken it down to make room for more photos of the grandkids, I asked for it.  And her response was, "Not now, sweetie, when the time is right." You see, I wanted that photo because, for whatever reason, I never ended up owning a big one of my own.  And since I've been married to Craig, he has, on several occassions let me know that THAT was the first picture that he saw of me (at my sisters house) that made him turn his head, and say "Who's that?"  So, I've wanted this picture for a while because I wanted to hang it on our wall to remind my husband of what he saw 10 years ago.  Because believe you me, I don't look like that any more! 

And since I've hung it in our living room, I've gazed at it a time or two (when the kids are watching Disney and I'm trying to read) and it has really brought back alot of emotions.   And it has also brought back memories of how Craig and I first met.  And I'm sure it doesn't help that I'm a bit emotional lately, but...who knew...my senior picture would really make me sit and wonder "Who's that?".  Who is that young, pregnant, teenage girl?

So Craig wasn't the only person who asked that question, I am now asking it of myself too. And, the funny thing is, when I first hung it up while my Mom was here, Colby turned around with that cute little dimpled grin, and his glowing blue-green eyes and asked, "Mommy, who's that?"  My response, "Colby, darlin', that's me."  And no matter how many times I look at that picture and wonder about that girl, about what her life was like, what she went through, how she ended up pregnant at seventeen, how she had the strength to go through with it all, how she was so...so, pretty and so strong, how her life has changed so much, I still can't believe it either.  That's me.  

Summer Reading -- Summer Watching -- Summer Relaxin' -- HELP!!!

I NEED YOUR HELP -- read on and see why and how you can make my day!

So, in order to make this summer feel like (as my Mom calls it) a "Ya Ya Summer" -- which is basically a laid back summer that is filled with lots of time at the pool or beach or lake (whichever fits your particular geographics) and lots of books, movies, television, good food, friends, and all that good stuff -- I have been trying to read, write, watch and swim to my hearts content.  And let me tell you, it feels ooohhhh so very, very good!  But, I need to enlist your help to make this the best "Ya Ya Summer" I can imagine!

I am actually sitting here awaiting the Season Premier of "Army Wives" on Lifetime and have been loving "So You Think You Can Dance" on Fox!  I've also been reading like a woman who hasn't been able to read for pleasure in years -- ummm -- because I haven't.  I stumbled upon Jodi Picoult and am loving her books.  I even went to Blockbuster the other day and was so daggone amazed as I walked through the New Release section because I hadn't seen MOST of the movies!  Now that's weird, and so not normal for me!  So, I went ahead and bought Movie Pass for the kids and I so we can watch as many movies as we want this month.  And I'll probably keep it going all summer long. 

So, as my sister, Ange, suggested -- we are going to try and stay busy this summer to try and ward of those "blue days" that happen because Craig isn't here.  The difference is, I am not going to do the running around crazy busy, like we are during the school year.  I am going to be a laid back pool going, book reading, movie watching, board game playing busy.  And... I need your help!!! 

Apparently, in the last year or so, I have been living in a crazy volunteering, ball game going, paper writing haze and have no idea what is good and terrific in the land of movies, books, and tv.  I take that back, I have still fit in my favorite tv shows.  But those out of the ordinary shows...nope, no time.  I've only had time for Grey's, Idol, and 30 Minute Meals.  So, friends, I need your help, PLEASE!!! Give me suggestions.  I need a good list of summer reads, good movies, tv shows, and your favorite ways to relax in the summer (please don't include anything that requires a husband, because, lest you forgot, mine is not here...and really, I don't think I want to know about those type of relaxing things).  Really friends, don't be shy.  This is the time I really, really need you to post a comment.  I'd love a nice little list of ideas... tv shows with the network channels I can find them on, book titles or artists new and old, great movies (and it doesn't matter if they're new or not), and your favorite things to do when it's hot outside.  If that includes recipes, suggestions on how to cool off, whatever, I'd love to hear about it!  Really, my dear, dear friends, thanks for playing -- it'd make my day!

Finally, a college graduate, need I say more?

Well, yes, actually, I do.  I need to say that this degree has been a long time in the making.  And because it's been such an unconventional journey, I think it does deserve a few more words. 

When I say it's been a long time in the making I'm not just talking about the 11 years I've been in and out and out and out and in and out and in college since I graduated high school. I'm talking about all the trials I've had and how much work it's been to go to college.  How much easier it would have been to just say, "You know what, it's not going to work for me, this is too hard."  Or, "Not right now, there is too much going on. I'll wait until the kids are older."  Or, "I'm not good enough, smart enough, meant for it."  Because those are all words that have invaded my thoughts many, many times. 

What I'm saying is, it's been a long journey that has taken time a long time and has nothing to do with time all the same.  A long journey because when I started, fresh out of high school with a scholarship and a brand new baby boy, I had only a couple of hours of sleep each day in order to work the night shift, go to school in the morning, and, as a single mother, take care of Daziel. It was a long journey when I decided to stick it out and take classes despite being pregnant and having Allyssa mid-term. A long journey when I decided to stop and take a break for a while to nurse a new baby girl, to move to a new base because Craig got orders.  It felt like a really long journey during the times I didn't think I could do it because Craig was in Korea for a year, yet I did it anyway.  Or the years I took a class or two while running my home daycare, and the times I paused to take a break because Craig deployed, or because we had another baby, or moved again.  And as you can read back on this blog, you can hear about the fun I've had in the last few years since we've lived here and I've been in school full time, and the obstacles that have come up.  On one hand, this journey seems as though it's been much longer than 11 years. And on the other hand, it doesn't even matter.  What matters is... I'm done.  What matters is, I've followed through with a dream that I've always had. 

A dream I've had ever since I was a little girl, a dream of going to college and getting my education, a dream of becoming "somebody important".  Probably since I was about this age...  or, maybe not this young -- but still a cute picture, right? ;-)

As a girl, for me, college was an unlikely dream.  Kind of like the "I want to be a rock star" or "I want to play professional ball".  But I wanted it anyways.  And it wasn't because it was expected and the thing to do in my family. Oh, don't get me wrong, my Mom and Dad always cared if I got good grades and were always very proud of me.  But, you see, it was unlikely because no one in my family, or the history of our family, had ever gone to college.   And to this day, I am still the first on either side of my family to graduate with my Bachelors Degree.  And I'm not bragging, because several people have gone to college and gotten associate degrees or specialty certificates, but for me -- being that this has always been my goal -it is a huge accomplishment! 

And, of course, growing up I had a different picture of how this journey would go.  My thoughts were:  get a scholarship out of high school, go to college, graduate from college, get a real good job, get really good at my good job, meet a handsome man, get married, spend time with the handsome man, have kids and live happily ever after.  Now, isn't that the dream most of us have had at some point in our lives?  And yes, I've accomplished many of the things on that list.  Actually, most of the things on that list.  Just... not in that order.  Which, has made it a challenge.  But one I have gladly accepted and am proud to have endured because it taught me about persistence, achievement, and it taught me that the little girl who was born in a tepee on top of a mountain in Idaho could still make dreams, and those dreams could still come true.

And I'm proud that my family has gone along on this journey with me too.  My kids have had to sacrifice Mom being there on many evenings. I've missed many dinners, bed times, and stories...some ball games, movies, and board games.  But I'm so proud that my kids did not complain and are so proud of me.  I am so proud that they have gotten to see this journey too. 

I am also very proud of the support Craig has given me.  Hours and hours that he did housework and kept the kids occupied so I could do homework, write papers, and take quizzes.  The evenings that he fed them dinner, took them to soccer, softball, and scouts.  And what makes me most proud, is that he did it (mostly :-) without complaint, he did it well, and on most nights, I would walk through my back door to a clean kitchen with the dishwasher going, the kids tucked snuggly in their beds, and the tv shows I had missed taped on my DVR.  (Now, what's not to love?)

And it's not just my husband and my kids that have been supportive along this journey.  I have had tremendous support from friends and family.  Help with watching my kids, giving encouraging words, helping to edit papers and help (right, help) with Math classes.  For all of you that have been a part of this LONG journey, THANK YOU!  Can you believe it, I'm done!! And, I'm also so happy to have my Mom here with me to share in this time.  Thanks Mom!! 

It IS October still, Right???

Oh, my, where have I been?  The other day, somebody was telling me about something upcoming and said "It's on November 17th", and I went right along with it.  She really meant March 17th. Truthfully, most days, I do think it's still October.  This fast roller-coaster of a year just has been taking ahold of me...and my time.  Hence why I still have yet to get Christmas Cards - or presents - out.  Perhaps we'll call them Easter gifts this year, folks.  What do you think about that??  So, in the week+ since I've posted, what have I meant to post???  Here ya go....

He's a HEART BREAKER (2/10/08)

Meet Sophia.  She belongs to my good friend, Delphine.  Del had to go out of town for a few days (four to be exact), and her husband is deployed, so I offered to keep her two youngest kiddos, Sophia and Zack (not pictured).  Sophia is Colby's age.  They are good buds - they were in the same half-day preschool class last year, get to hang out all the time because their Mom's are both volunteering crazies, and are in the same class again this year.  Aren't they cute?? 

Cute, you agree?  Well, let me tell you a story about our Cute Colby.  A few weeks ago while we were at the school setting up for our Movie Night, Sophia came up to Delphine and told her that Colby had kissed her.  My five-year-old, smack, smooch, kissed her!!!  Delphine and I both looked at each other, muffled a laugh, bit a lip, and frowned at both of our youngsters.

Later that weekend, I sat down and had "a talk" with Colby. He told me he kissed Sophia because he wanted her to be his girlfriend. I told him how "we don't kiss girls unless they are our girlfriends or better yet, wives, and he is NOT to have a girlfriend until he is at least 18, 21 would even be better, and that really if he wanted to know the whole truth, I would prefer if he waited until he was married to kiss a girl, and to that, I would say...dear son, please wait until you are 30 and educated before you get married, so that means, 30 before you're kissing girls -- so, for now, Colby, you are WAY TOO YOUNG TO BE KISSING GIRLS and NO, NO, NO she CAN NOT be your girlfriend!!".  Feeww!! *Breath* Sheeshhh...what a talk to have with a five-year-old.  And yes, I did say all that.  And yes, I did forget to breath.

So, the talk was well received. Because after all of that, he looked at me with and odd, "where did I get her from" look (I don't know why) and he said, "OK Mom!!" 

Then, a few days later, my family was all in the grocery store together.  As we were checking out, we saw some of those ENORMOUS hearts with the chocolates inside.  Colby was begging for one.  I told him, "Colby, you don't get to buy one of those for yourself, those are to give your Valentine on Valentine's Day.  That means, your wife or girlfriend..." (And I was about to go on in regards to how he won't be able to buy a chocolate heart until he is 30 because...as we had already discussed) when Allyssa chimed in, "You can get one for Sophia, Colby."  He immediately looked at me with big, disgusted eyes and said, "No, not Sophia!" (Good boy, I've brainwashed trained you well!) Craig then said, "Well, then you could buy one for Mommy?!?"  Colby looked at me with even bigger, more disgusted eyes and said, "Noooooo, not Mommy!!"  "I know" he declared, "I could buy one for Grandma Sharon!"

So, that would have been a cute enough story, left as it, right?  Of course, and it was.  Until we got in the van after paying for our groceries and Colby said, "Mom, I couldn't buy those chocolates for Sophia because of what you told me.  And I told her all about what you told me.  We were on the playground at recess and we talked about it.  I told her that I was not old enough and that I had to be thirty."  Craig looked at me with a curious look, I looked at Craig and smiled proud.  My baby, knowing where his boundaries are.  But then, he said, "Yep, when Sophia and I were playing, I stopped her.  I sat her down and...I broke it to her."  Oh goodness me!  Craig and I looked at each other and both of our eyes filled with tears, smiles so wide, we were both trying so hard not to burst out laughing.  Stifling my belly-laughter, I asked, "And, Colby, how did she take it?"  "Ok" he told me, quite optimistically, "she just chased me!"  And at that, we could not hold it in any longer.  We laughed, and laughed, and laughed, almost all the way home.  Oh, my heart breaker!!

Valentine Fun (2/14/08)

I got up this morning and made these for my children...can you tell they are heart pancakes with strawberries and bananas on them?  No?  Well, they could!  And they quite enjoyed them...

I got the pancake molds from Lillian Vernon.  They work really well. We also made homemade Valentines last night for all their classrooms.  We even got "Daddy" (Craig) in on it.  He helped tie quite a few ribbons.  The kids made these special treats for their teachers...I got the idea from Split Coast Stampers, I get alot of ideas from there.  If you don't already, you should check it out.  Type in whatever you're looking for in the search area, and go to town.  You're sure to find lots of ideas.

 

Happy Valentine's Day!!!
And..   Happy Birthday to Grandpa Alan!!!!!!!!!

Killian for A WHOLE WEEK!! (2/16/08)

Craig went yesterday to get Killian.  He has -- what his school calls Winter Break this week.  So he's here to hang out with us.  He still gets Spring Break, so not so sure what this is all about.  But we're not complaining!!  He's having a good time so far.  Look how big he's getting, and how darn cute he is!!! (Shhh, don't tell him I told you that.)

What's cool is...this Friday is our Talent Show. So, he is going to perform with Daziel, Allyssa and Colby and all four of the kids will be in it together.  How sweet is that?  Craig won't be on leave any more (have I mentioned he's had the last two weeks off of work - he's been studying - he tests for Master Sgt. on the 20th??)  But we'll still have a good time.  I'll get to take him to the school and show him around.  Daz's teachers are pretty cool, so he'll get to hang with them a few times.  Plus, I figured he can help me take Nicholas (technically his dog) to get groomed, and go to a movie or something during the day, just me and him for fun.  Sweet!  So glad for any time we get to have him!!!

Skin on the sides, a 1 on top (2/17/08)

After church today, we went to the Barber Shop so Craig, Daz and Colby could all get haircuts.  If you haven't already heard, Colby LOVES to get his haircut!  He actually starts begging a week or two into a haircut to get another one.  And, as the previous picture of him and Sophia shows, he was actually in need of one, per his standards.  He is very proud of his haircuts!  He sports them around and says "Don't touch my haircut! You'll mess it up!!"  Because, we all love to rub a nicely shaved Colby cut!  (Note - this is funny, because after his haircuts, there is NOTHING left to mess up!) So, Colby gets haircuts quite frequently.  The same cut as Craig.  (Hmnnn..go figure!) And when he climbs up in the barber's chair, he knows exactly what to say, "I want skin on the sides, a 1 on top".  That's barber lingo for the size of the razor they use on his cut - short!!  And here it is, skin on the sides, 1 on top...

 

 

As A Parent

As a parent, you try to teach your children the best way you can, the best way you know how.  You teach them about love and trust; about life and the world around them.  You take them on journey's, you try to teach them lessons. You take them to the water's edge....and by golly, you don't even throw them in!  But somewhere along life's path, you've got to learn to let go (and I'm not talking about letting go as you're standing there dangling them over the dam), but letting go and letting them lead the way, letting them be in charge of their own path.  And when you do this, you've got to hope they don't decide to push you into the fast flowing waters.  Hope and pray that they love you enough to spare you from the icy cold currents of torture...

As a parent, you've got to trust that they can stand at the waters edge without you there to hold their hand...  That they can stand there with their siblings, and that they will love them enough not to push them in, fully clothed, into muddy brown water, to laugh in their face as they wade out of the sludge, covered in slimy muck, looking as if they had just crawled from the sewers.

As a parent, you've got enjoy that your kids will have each other to lean on, to squish up next to, to make funny faces with, and...to fart on.  Can't you see the look on Colby's face?  Totally guilty!!

As a parent, you must realize that your children will have their own lives and that they will grow strong, and be there for each other.  They will come to one another for advise, and love, and sometimes you may be left out.  As a parent you have to understand that your children will look to one-another as they cross over bridges during the journey of their life, and sometimes, you even get to watch as they enjoy the view (and listen as they tell the story through their eyes).   

Daz:  "Hey Colby, do you see that duck over there?"

Colby:  "Yeah.  Well, which one?  The white one or the brown one?"

Daz:  "The one that's taking a dump!"  Te he he.  He he he.

Allyssa: "Eeewww!  Gross!!!"

Colby:  "Cool.  Really?  Wait, ducks don't dump.  Do they?"                              

As a parent, you must have faith that you've done all you can do, so that your children can walk the line, balance on the wall... and not fall - unless of course you were so senseless as to name your child Humpty. As a parent, you pray that your children will make it across the wall of life in one piece, and as a parent, you get to take great pride as you watch them balance, and succeed!